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Saturday, Apr 20, 2024

Examining Middlebury College's dating zones What that invitation to 'dinner and a movie' may reveal about your suitor

Author: Joseph Bergan

While some may believe that dating may be dead at Middlebury College - here at The Middlebury Campus, thoughts remain positive. High levels of sweaty grinding at Tavern are beginning to force more people off-campus, to perhaps achieve some kind of "real" relationship. Dating is hard and takes a lot of thought, and with mounting class and extracurricular work, it seems like two good kids just do not have the time to sit down together and talk. This is a guide for those who are lucky enough to actually go on a date in the town of Middlebury. This is not a review of local establishments or their services per se, but instead, a guideline for how to react when someone takes you to these locations. It may be a fact that Noonie's has terrific sandwiches, but the dating game is seldom about the food and more about that face looking at you from across the table.


Noonie's Deli

Is this a terrific place to take a date, or the worst? On one hand, the sandwiches are spectacular and there is a quiet upstairs room where small talk may blossom into eventual canoodling. On the other hand, it is a deli, fully equipped with a jar of huge pickles. Your partner is probably too nervous to take you to dinner but your relationship has surpassed the Gamut Room. The feel here is more of a "Good Will Hunting" type of date than your average expensive steak dinner with awkward laughter.


Carol's Hungry Mind Café

This café, entering its sophomore year, has come to be the Saturday morning go-to spot. Everything on the menu is relatively cheap, so no worries about the awkward "I got it," "Oh no, I can, I, Uh, let me, this once, uh, oh, uh, I'm sorry." You can just grab a coffee or a smoothie and lounge on their leather couch. Unlike Middlebury Market & Café, this spot is off the main drag so it feels a bit further off-campus and there is less of a chance of seeing someone to disrupt the date flow.


A Taste of India

The promise of Indian food, as well as a date, at this locale is full of promise. You have graduated from the informal meetings and something is special in your relationship, but you are not quite at the Storm Café level. A date here will give you something different, and it tells you that whoever asked you here has cycled through all the cliché date options around town and settled upon something unique, but not too quirky.


Storm Cafe

A date here means that your relationship has reached a new stage. Your boyfriend or girlfriend has something to announce. Though as pricey as Fire and Ice, the décor is modern, sleek and romantic. Small tables and a nice wine list make for the perfect environment in which to exchange promise rings. However, if this is a first date, be wary. The person who asked you may be something of a Casanova. They obviously know that this is the "it" date place and they may be thinking of more than just dinner, if you know what I mean.


Fire and Ice

This Middlebury institution is known about town as the place for steaks and a nice salad bar. The type of person who will ask you here is either a young man eager to show off his parents' credit card, or a young woman looking for a young man to show off his parents' plastic. The only real reason to bring someone into this restaurant is because it is expensive, and is known around town as "that expensive restaurant." The fact is whoever asked you here lacks originality and cares little for what you want. He or she will buy you chocolates on Valentine's day and think it's okay.


The Proctor Balcony

Although you will try and justify it in your head as you walk up those stairs balancing your tray, there is no denying it - your man is a scrub. He may have lured you in with the promise of an all-you-can-eat salad bar, or the oh-so-romantic "chicken parm." Your fellow clientele, Frisbee players and student groups conducting informal dinner meetings, bask in the same unforgiving fluorescent light you find in every room on campus. Proctor is wonderful for your everyday dinner, but the panini machine only goes so far.


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