Panther Blood: An exercise in bi-winning

The past few weeks, there have been several op-eds printed in the Campus protesting the stifling nature of Middlebury’s rigorous academic demands. Although I agreed with many of the arguments presented in the op-eds, as a lifelong nerd with no hope of salvation and a puppet of the administration, I feel honor-bound to defend our institution and its stressed inhabitants.

I don’t think we can make Middlebury students into the young adult equivalent of peaceful woodland creatures by slashing a couple response papers from every course’s syllabus. Being busy is a part of our genetic code. You can see for yourself in Bi Hall — several students have been spending every weekend this semester sequencing the average Middlebury student’s DNA (This research only pertains to the study of Classics, or Regs. The researchers had no luck in pinning down a Feb long enough to collect some of their legendary golden saliva). Oh wait, you don’t have time to walk to Bi Hall? Me neither! Let’s be friends!

Midd Kids don’t need drugs. Experiences are our drug. We collect student organization email lists like they are Beanie Babies — we sign up for dozens of things that sound mildly amusing, and only weeks later regret our gullibility when the emails pile up, untouched forever. If every moment of our day is not CAPS LOCK WORTHY, we think we are doing something wrong. I think that’s where the anxiety expressed in these op-eds is coming from. It’s not that we’re overwhelmed, it’s just that we have the sneaking suspicion that we’re missing out on something. Such doubts send the Midd Kid into a rage of Cookie Monster proportions — but I think campus would be a sad and quiet place without the student body OM NOM NOMing their way through life, gobbling up every opportunity that comes their way.

I’ve renounced any hope of kicking my addiction to the Middlebury lifestyle. I begin each semester with a formidable array of responsibilities, but always have to deal with the unavoidable fear that I won’t be busy enough. It eats away at me until I volunteer for several more things, and I sigh in relief when my Google Calendar has less than 10 percent empty space (I’ve been told that my Google Calendar should be printed in the Campus. Let’s just say my event descriptions get slightly more colorful the later it gets in the semester i.e work at the circulation desk becomes Salaried Self Pity, Compensated Procrastination or Prolonged Desk Molestation, and I often leave myself depressing reminders to “Die from a Thinking Overdose” or “Win at Life.”). I drink more caffeine every day than most people drink in a week. And, I am blissfully happy in my insanity, because it is incredibly easy to spend all my time doing things I love.

Here I can wake up and go to Proctor and have a debate about immigration or feminism or the pros and cons of tempeh or whether Martin Sheen, Kevin Kline or Harrison Ford played the best fictional president. I can go hear opera at the Center for the Arts or I can walk outside and hear an unkindness of first-years scream that “Tomorrow is Saturday” and “Sunday comes afterwards” at the top of their lungs. I can go to Old Stone Mill or 51 Main and be incredibly impressed by everything that our student body manages to accomplish.

All of this stimulating awesomeness occurs outside of our academic and extracurricular life, which is just as rewarding. Despite my often oppressive sarcasm concerning all things Middlebury, I am going to miss this place SO much come May.

Middlebury does not have a creativity deficit. If anything, I think our insatiable Middness, our inability to slow down, our unsquelchable excitement about EVERYTHING, feeds into our ability to the most productive, creative and intelligent mass of people I have ever met.

I know this argument has been made millions of times (rough estimate) before, but people just need to chill out. Our intellectual growth does not come at the expense of creativity. They are symbiotic creatures, like Vincent A. Jones, IV and Facebook, Sunday Night Group and pure unadulterated joy at everything and Ross and pizza. Just because you had to write two response papers last night doesn’t mean your life-long ambition of being the next Banksy or David Mamet or Taylor Mali has been extinguished forever.

Middlebury students are like Charlie Sheen. We’re bi-winning. We can win at academics and creativity. It’s not an either/or scenario. We got magic and poetry in our fingertips. We have Panther blood. It’s time for us to embrace our stress, instead of trying to relinquish it. Remember, suffering is good for art.