Protesters Condemn Kissing Show's 'Sexist,' 'Racist' Content

Author: Deborah Jones

"Sexist," "heterosexist" and "racist" was how five student protesters described Michael Christian's (pen and stage name William Cane) "The Art of Kissing," which was performed to a packed McCullough Social Space on Saturday evening.

The event, organized and sponsored by Middlebury College Activities Board (MCAB), was a presentation of 30 different kissing and role-play situations, modeled by eight male-female pairs of students and emceed by Christian. He is the author of five books on the subject, a former English professor at Boston College and was nominated for the 2001 National Association for Campus Activities Speaker of the Year Award.

Some viewers found the kissing demonstrations to be far from artistic and at times shocking and offensive. Five Middlebury women — Nahal Batmanghelidj '02, Kristen Gray '02, Samantha Severin '02, Katie Mae Simpson '02 and Gillian Wood '03 — protested during and after the performance.

According to Eve Coronado '02, a member of MCAB's executive board, the organization did substantial research before deciding to bring "The Art of Kissing" to campus. They gathered information on the presentation and asked Feminist Action at Middlebury (FAM), Middlebury Open Queer Alliance (moqa) and Gay and Lesbian Employees at Middlebury (GLEAM) to approve it last September. The groups expressed no concerns at that time. Gray later maintained that the clubs had not been given enough information to make an educated decision about the program.

Coronado also contacted several schools that have hosted Christian in the past and was told that students enjoyed the show and that there had been no complaints from either feminist or gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender groups. Nevertheless, in addition to the ensuing demonstration, a number of audience members expressed uneasiness during and after the show.

Gray noted that the qualms about the show were sparked during a FAM meeting last week in which members expressed concern that Christian's Web site contained material that perpetuated gender stereotypes and ignored homosexuality. Kissing.com includes advice to young female visitors, telling them that "there are three things that you must do if you want boys to kiss you: dress right, smile and act friendly and flirt." The language is strictly heterosexual in its wording.

Although the possibility of a protest against "The Art of Kissing" was first addressed at a FAM meeting and through its e-mail list, Gray explained that the participants were "a group of concerned individuals, some affiliated with FAM and some with moqa," but that neither group could be considered a real sponsor of the initiative. MCAB, which knew of the possibility of a disruption but was unable to negotiate a compromise with the protesters, allowed them to purchase tickets for and enter the performance despite their toting of posters, condoms and a megaphone.

"If we didn't disapprove of anything, we weren't going to do anything," Gray said. "[The protest] wasn't completely spontaneous but it wasn't preplanned either." The demonstrators especially opposed what they viewed to be Christian's continuous reinforcement of gender stereotypes in role plays. The show did not consist solely of exhibitions of different types of kisses, but rather asked participants to imagine themselves in certain relationships, including professor-student, dentist-patient and client-hairdresser, in which the women always represented the latter, less powerful character. Those protesting also expressed frustration with the emcee's seeming unwillingness to address homosexuality. When Christian asked women in the audience how they liked "boys" to kiss them, Gray raised her hand and responded that she did not like boys to kiss her. Christian then asked the room for "serious answers."

In one of the most controversial moments of the evening, the emcee told a story of how, as a teenager, he fantasized about spanking and ultimately did spank his girlfriend. He later had the role-players act out this situation.

"He 'eroticized' hitting a woman without her consent," Gray said. "I don't think that we should 'eroticize' violence in any non-consensual way." At this point in the performance, she set off an alarm on her megaphone and was given a warning by public safety. She was later asked to leave after she threw condoms into the crowd. Christian noted kissing can be a good way to get to know a partner without engaging in sexual intercourse. "I don't strongly object to that point," Gray noted. "But I do find it foolish and irresponsible. His speech was highly sexualized yet he had this kissing for abstinence thing. You have a responsibility to encourage people to engage in sex safely."

The protesters also cited evidence of disrespect for concerns about violence against women in Christian's remark that men like "bad" girls and that females should dress and act in a risqué manner if they wanted to be pursued. They found this to be particularly disconcerting in light of the recent campus dialogue on rape. "A lot of times with rape, if a woman was dressed in a way perceived to be sexy [at the time she was violated]…that can be used against her later," explained Gray. "It's a sort of double standard that we thought needed to be highlighted sometime during or after the show."

Racism in the program was another concern of the demonstrating women, but one that never imagined addressing until Christian asked his role-players to exhibit what he called the "Asian kiss" and the "Trobriand Islands kiss." In the former, performers were to act "shy" and look both ways multiple times before leaning in for a quick kiss. The latter required the women to groom the arms and bite the eyelashes of the man. Some felt that these demonstrations were done in a manner that unnecessarily ridiculed people from Asia and the South Pacific.

Two of the original performers, Dana Allen '04.5 and Virginia Snodgrass '02, backed out of the show after the pre-curtain practice. Allen explained that once learning what participants were expected to do, he felt that "We were using these silly gender stereotypes to perpetuate a cycle of violence against women for comedic value. That's not something I'm willing to support or participate in."

Coronado, commenting on the show as a whole, said, "Comedians say some things…for the sake of laughter….It's up to the individual to judge. I can certainly see how people could be upset; I could certainly see how it could be taken lightly as well."

After Gray was asked to leave the performance, the other protesters followed her to the area between the Social Space and the Grille to regroup. At the show's conclusion, they positioned themselves in the lobby to answer questions, hand out condoms and display their signs.

Conflict occurred when Simpson, who was holding a poster asking if oral sex was not kissing, was asked to discard her sign by a Public Safety officer and trainee.

She was told that the poster, which showed images of couples engaged in oral sex (from Starr Library's copies of "The Joy of Sex," "The Joy of Gay Sex" and "The Joy of Lesbian Sex"), was offensive. When she repeatedly refused to leave with the sign, which Gray explained was part of the group's stance that intense kissing and sexuality cannot be separated, the officers called for backup — three additional officers and two trainees soon arrived — and also contacted the Middlebury Police Department.

The protesters, who say that they received no concrete answer from any of the officers as to why Simpson should discard her poster, ultimately left, but not without stating that their voices were being silenced by the College.

Director of Public Safety Lisa Boudah, acknowledging that the College has no set policy at this time as to how to handle protests, said, "We have to rely on individuals to make decisions and make them from their perception.

Determin
ing the best way to approach a situation [at a particular point in time] is always going to be a human decision even if we give officers the guidelines."

However, she noted that the College is investigating how to respond to demonstrations. "It's been very eye-opening to us, and we're going to work to make certain everyone has a clear understanding of how to protest and how to respond to protesting."