In My Humble Opinion Shut up and go vote

Author: Daniel Roberts

I was excitedly hustling into Proctor (Chicken Cacciatore baby!) with a buddy of mine when a cute girl called out at us, "Do you guys need absentee ballots?" Huh? Absentee ballot? "Right, yeah... I do need one of those," I sheepishly lied. Then, ever omniscient, she said, "Do you also need to register to vote?" Wow, am I that transparent? Apparently yes, I am.

So I jotted down my name and headed into Proctor for some eats and treats. Then, as I feasted, I thought more about this voting thing. The longer I considered it, the guiltier I felt. I could not believe I had never registered to vote. It is embarrassing, especially after sitting through a mandatory "Election" course my senior year of high school in which we learned about the pathetically low voter turnout among young people. I cynically sat through that class rolling my eyes.

It is completely understandable that our generation is alienated from politics. The three presidents we have been around for were Bush, Clinton, and Bush 2 - The Sequel. Assuming none of us were interested in politics at the age of six, let's begin with Clinton. I love Slick Willy, but come on - no one can think of him now without recalling his Oval Office "adventures." His comment in 1996 about smoking marijuana but "never inhaling" is still quoted today. It is unfortunate that these antics made him a smarmy figure, because he was arguably one of the most influential presidents. Still, like it or not, Clinton went out with a less-than-respectable bang. Literally.

Next we were given George W. Bush, whose drunk driving arrest, inability to grasp correct grammar, and immature usage of daddy's connections were all overlooked as he beat Al Gore in 2000 and then, miraculously, earned a second term in 2004. This was despite questionable ties to Enron, as well as dubious dealings with brother Jeb down in Florida. Now I know some moron (the same kid who brags about how wasted he was last night) is going to tell me, "Dude come on, hate on Bush, but Clinton? He's the bomb! He was a pimp president yo!" Fine. He is a cool guy, happy? But honestly, between him and Dubya, we have yet to see a president that actually treats the job in a conventional manner - with genuine integrity.

In addition, we could take a look at, say, the 2003 California governor's circus. Oops, I mean race. The candidates included Larry Flynt, publisher of Hustler magazine, Georgina Russell, a software engineer who handed out thongs that said "Georgy for Governor," and Mary Carey Cook, an "erotic actress." How can we take politics seriously?

Our motivation to vote is only lessened by sleazy commercials. My favorite smear ad in the Massachusetts governor race shows the worst picture of Kerry Healey they could find, under the words, "She's not just any soccer mom, she's different, because most soccer moms wouldn't deny education to immigrants." Ouch.

Still, the trashiness of today's political world should not quash your urge to vote. If anything, a despicable ad should make you want to get off the couch and find out which candidate is different.

The only way we can change the status quo is by voting for someone better. The U.S. 46 percent voter turnout in 2004 amongst 18-24 year olds is disappointing. Less than half? Middlebury could beat that. If you were able to click a button on webmail to vote in the SGA elections, then you can probably fill out a form and shove it into an envelope. These MiddVote kids make it easy - they even give you a stamp.

I encourage everyone on campus to vote in your state's next election. And no, I should not sound preachy because, as I said, I was not registered either. Until yesterday. Thank you, again, to those kids who are more involved than me, which is everyone.

Seriously though, maybe if every single U.S. citizen age 18-24 had voted in 2004, we would be discussing how much we love President Nader. Like that "Angels in the Outfield" kid says, "Hey, it could happen!" I guess it didn't for Ralph, but you get my point.