the ethicist

Author: Amanda Greene

Sometimes it's hard to ask for help. Relying on others means that we have to be open and honest, and that we have to talk about things that we would like to ignore, or keep to ourselves. Girls are often placed in particularly difficult situations because we have to talk frequently about our sex lives. We gossip lightheartedly with friends, but also have to converse more seriously with doctors. When we talk to doctors about issues of intimacy, we assume that that they will be professional, objective and non-judgmental. We confide in them as health experts and not as people who are close in age to our parents.

It's not unreasonable then, for students to expect that Health Center staff will address our concerns, and deal with our issues without judging our sexual practices. My friend, X, went in for the morning-after pill and was asked a series of questions - "Do you have a boyfriend?" "How long have you and your boyfriend been together?"- about her relationship status. I understand that the Health Center, in these circumstances, must inquire about your sexual history and any medications that you are currently on. But your physical health is not affected by whether you are dating, engaged to or crushing on whomever you just slept with.

My other friend, Y, went in for a STD test. She had a one-night stand that she was less than thrilled about. Y was regretful, embarrassed and nervous. She was terrified about the prospect of having a disease that would affect her long-term health. The nurses at the Health Center reprimanded her for having unprotected sex and scoffed at her judgment. Y was distraught about the situation, and came seeking medical help. It was unethical for the staff to judge the circumstances that necessitated her visit.

Jobs often demand that people play a certain role, and act differently than they would if they were not at work. It's fine for nurses to disapprove of Middlebury students' behavior, but their disapproval should not be something that Middlebury students can ascertain. Girls come to the Health Center feeling vulnerable and anxious, and they should leave feeling supported, not judged.

That said, the Health Center is a wonderful resource, and the staff members are incredibly knowledgeable, caring and committed to helping students. I am thankful for everything that they do, and hope that this column, by discussing how many girls feel, makes the Health Center staff more aware of, and sensitive to Middlebury students' perceptions of the treatment they receive.

And now for this week's question:

Q: I was in the locker room at the gym and found an iPod in the corner on the floor. I left it alone, figuring that someone had placed it there or forgotten it, and was surprised when to see it there the next day. It's been a week and the iPod is still in the spot where I first noticed it. Is it ok for me to take it, assuming that it has been lost by its owner, or am I obligated to leave it untouched. If I don't take it, what is to stop someone else from claiming it? Is there a time limit, after which the iPod becomes the property of whoever finds it?
- Tempted-by-Tunes

A: Although tempting, you cannot just take the iPod. At this point in time, you should give it to someone who works in the gym, and ask him or her about the appropriate procedures. Most likely, the gym staff will hold the iPod in the hope that its owner will claim it. If it remains unclaimed it will likely become yours after a few weeks. You are obligated to attempt to reunite the iPod with its tuneless owner, but if it remains orphaned, you are welcome to adopt it.

Want to consult the ethicist? Send submissions to amgreene@middlebury.edu