‘Date doctor’ encourages student relationships

In his 15 years as the U.S.’ own Dating Doctor, David Coleman has spoken to over two million people about love and has memorized over 11,000 pickup lines. Last Friday, Jan. 15, he came to McCullough Student Center and gave his advice to some Midd kids.

Coleman’s philosophy on dating is simple:

“You aren’t going to find the right person until you become the right person.” So, to all you lonesome single people out there, if you’re not dating,

“it’s your own damn fault.” If you’re unhappy with the person you are, then that’s going to be reflected in your body language and turn people away from you before you get the chance to say yes or no.

It’s up to you to take the first steps to getting into the dating scene — simply being single isn’t enough.

“It’s a self-fulfilling prophesy,” Coleman explained.

“You end up living your life trying to prove to yourself that you aren’t successful.”

Katie Anderson ’13 gained newfound perspective from the lecture. “Coleman’s talk was really inspiring,” she said.

“He changed the way I look at dating.”

Another reason people find themselves single is that they do not take initiative when they find someone who has potential.

According to Coleman, everyone has ‘hmm’s’ — “people who stop you dead in your tracks and might not even notice you checking them out, but inside your head, you’re looking at them and going ‘hmm.’” Most people in the audience admitted to never speaking to their hmms and letting them slip away. In response to that, he said,

“Be a fat penguin, because fat penguins break the ice.”

Coleman has worked individually with people to help them sort out their dating issues. In general, he deals with three types of people: those who are too cocky for their own good, those who are too shy and those who have been left cynical after too many failed relationships.

During and after the show, he offered dating advice to anyone who asked for help. Kelsey Allan ’12, who attended the same show at Middlebury last year, said she was back because she had received some really great personal advice from Coleman before. Rafael Kennedy ’13 also valued Coleman’s visit.

“I’ve got a great girlfriend now, but if I ever break up with her (and I hope I never do), I’ll definitely use Coleman’s advice.”

Most often, Coleman ends up giving advice to women who chase men who are emotionally unavailable — the “bad boys.”

He explained that “women like bad boys because they are strong — minded and stubborn. They don’t like the weak-minded men they can push over.”

Before coming on stage, Coleman already knew a lot about the dating scene at Middlebury.

“There are three types of people here: people who are in a long-term relationship, people who are just hooking up and people who are floundering in the middle,” he stated matter-of-factly. His advice?

“Take advantage of the fact that you’re on a campus, surrounded by people who are around the same age and have the same goals. You’ve got to have the guts to ask someone out.”