Cooking (not) by the Book

I remember the first time I had it. It had been a fairly unimpressive food day (sorry, Proctor) and I was bemoaning what I perceived to be the lack of viable dessert options after dinner.

I couldn’t (or wouldn’t) get involved with a Black Forest Bar — I think it’s the cherries that are the insurmountable obstacle.

A handful of chocolate chips seemed boring, and ice cream in January just isn’t really my thing.

In what I realize now was an effort to stop my complaining, a friend offered to make a dessert and “surprise me.”

I was expecting some sort of banana-peanut butter concoction with chocolate thrown in for good measure; what I got was immeasurably better.

On first glance, it looked like chocolate soup, but it definitely had a crunch. On first bite, I realized it wasn’t just chocolate — there were other ingredients in there that gave it a subtle sweetness, without being overwhelming.

It seemed to be sugary and salty all at once, like a really good chocolate-covered pretzel.

There were hints of something else as well, which I later learned was melted peanut butter. (I’m a sucker for peanut butter. I can get on board with pretty much anything that incorporates it as an ingredient, unless it has cherries. Then I’m out).

So, without further ado, the recipe for this mysterious chocolate chip creation:

1. Grab one of the ceramic bowls by the salad bar at Proctor (the plastic bowls just don’t cut it for this operation). Head over to the chocolate chips, and fill up the bowl with whatever amount you’re craving. But a word of warning: bring this dessert back to your table, and you’ll suddenly find that you had a lot more friends than you realized, so be sure to make enough for everyone! We use both chocolate chips and white chocolate chips in a roughly three-to-one ratio, but again, that’s up to you.

2. Microwave the chocolate chips for 45 seconds.

Stir after microwaving until your mixture is smooth.

Add in your preferred amount of smooth peanut butter. I recommend skipping the natural kind for this recipe, because the processed peanut butter adds some much-needed sugar to the semi-sweet chocolate chip mixture.

Stir the peanut butter into your chocolate mixture and return it to the microwave.

Make sure the peanut butter is stirred into the mixture, because if you microwave without stirring, the peanut butter will burn!

3. Microwave the new chocolate-chip peanut butter mixture for 15-20 seconds. Stir again after removing it from the microwave, and make your way to the Special K.

4. Here’s where the crunch comes in: stir some Special K into your mixture (the amount is up to you), and then head over to the ice cream table to pick up a sugar cone.

Crumple the cone into the chocolate-peanut mixture with the Special K. In the event of a Special K shortage in Proctor, compensate by adding in another crunched-up cone to the mixture.

5. The final touch comes from adding — wait for it — salt! Grab a salt shaker from a poor, unsuspecting diner, and gently sprinkle salt until the top of your chocolate-peanut butter creation is covered with a light layer. Then stir one last time, grab some spoons, and enjoy!

I’m not going to lie, this dessert can seem a bit labor-intensive. But really, we’re all looking to procrastinate, so what better way to put off that political science reading than indulging in some chocolatey goodness?

And one last note: though ice cream in winter isn’t my cup of tea, your chocolate creation is also a great ice cream topping (particularly for mint chocolate chip). Let me know how it goes. I’ll be waiting by the microwave!