Looking Back: September 24th, 1992

As one Campus editor pointed out, I have often gleefully mocked The Middlebury Campus, but have contributed nothing to its betterment. I am offering this column now in accord with his sentiment, which went something like, It is easy to tear something down, but better to build something up. Criticizing is the art of skillfully misunderstanding. And as we will all one day discover, as if awakening from a nap in the steel blue library armchair of life, in a lightning flash of divine revelation through the turbulent, clouded atmosphere of thought, cynicism is ugly and disdain is tiresome.

Thus, I ask you all to admire this newspaper and the wonderful gray paper and black ink under your fingers. Look what an opportunity it is. two thousand-odd young, energetic readers, all living together in the same place. You could spend a lifetime trying to develop a publication with as much potential power.

The purpose of this column: To reintroduce us to The Campus by revealing its history. In order to appreciate the ideas in its pages, we must consider the paper a friend. Someone we are, at times, willing to take advice from. And, therefore, we must learn its biography, so that we may sympathize with its flaws and oddities and embrace its traditions and strengths.

I therefore bring you, from page nine of the Sept. 24, 1992 issue of The Campus, a funny article about condoms by Trisha Lucey. The health center springs for Trojan-Enz over the apparently suspicious and “cheesy” Lifestyle brand. More optimistic economic times for Middlebury, clearly (McCardell had just become president). We have since reverted to Lifestyle and thrown some Durex into the mix. The article claims that these and Trojans are equally reliable — I can confirm only that Durex make serviceable, if somewhat fragile, water balloons. They have never inspired me with confidence as a brand — for a condom that does inspire, check out Inspiral condoms! With unique twisting shape and lubricated spring action! I wonder if Jyoti Daniere, who is getting so much press of late (see the last three issues of The Campus, and now, this one) will be awarded a special “celebrity budget” by the College and choose to bring in some free, high-tech, big-name condoms. The company that makes Inspiral also has one shaped like a dolphin, although I can hardly believe the pictures on the company’s Web site, and am eager to see for myself when my sampler pack arrives.

The Campus’ treatment of sex in general tends to have a distinctly utilitarian bent. I usually feel a little queasy when the sex articles mention nerve endings, or touch on orgasms and STIs in the same sentence. But I’m sensitive, and maybe the matter-of-fact approach, sprinkled with the occasional irony-tinged allusion to the romance behind the mechanics (a habit this article avoids), is the best way young Americans have figured out to talk about this.

The last paragraph in the article points to an interesting trend in the treatment of students as economic entities. The health center’s approach to condom distribution anticipates what Internet-pirated music suppliers would (and continue to) meekly suggest is the model for illegal student downloading. It’s that endearing disciplinary attitude characteristic of tired parents — the excuses don’t have to be believable, they have to have that comforting ring. There’s plenty more to say, but this is just a warm up. Stick with us.