When puberty comes around, little boys learn about the very rewarding experience of becoming a man. It is the time of muscle building, getting hair on your chest and get- ting a man’s voice. Everything gets bigger and manlier and what’s better than being a man in today’s patriarchy? Nothing. But for the female-bodied folk among us, the pro- cess is very different.
Yes, there’s the womanly figure and the magic of having babies, but puberty is also the time you get your period, affectionately called the curse of all women. (Not to men- tion that giving birth is something we’re taught is terrifying and it isn’t very sensitive to every body type to describe just one as womanly).
Puberty is awful enough, without so- cietal constructs that make you feel shame around your body and it’s functions. Women and men alike are taught to view the period as something dirty and unpleasant. It is pres- ent in multiple aspects of life, from religious conventions and cultural views, to the media.
Am I saying that having your period is an amazing experience? No. I get there’s a struggle. Menstruation is an experience that varies immensely from person to person and for many that includes a rush of hormones, cramps, bloating, etc. in addition to the icon- ic bleeding. However, there’s a big difference between saying that having your period can be unpleasant and saying it’s something dis- gusting. Because when something is disgust- ing, we feel the need to hide it.
Menstruation is something about half of us are familiar with, and from the biological perspective, it’s pretty amazing. I’m sorry but can any other organ cyclically renew its inner lining in preparation for hosting fetal devel- opment? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Does this process come with an influx of hormones? Yes. Does that make me incapable of func- tioning as a rational human being and that you can invalidate my opinion? No.
Most advertisements for feminine hy- giene products feature how worry free and clean you can be using their product. How awful is it to have to be worrying about being seen as ‘clean’ over something you can’t con- trol? When you go to the gym, you sweat and take a shower to clean yourself. Maybe it’s been a hot day so you wash your face and use some deodorant. What do you do that causes your period? Nothing. You exist. There is no ‘dirty’ practice people do in order to get their periods. Yet it’s seen as far less embarrassing to be sweaty or have pit stains than to be on your period or stain a pair of pants.
The difference is we all sweat (or just about everyone at least). Meanwhile not all of us have periods, and empathy is often a crucial ingredient for understanding. This is a man’s world and in a man’s world, wom- en aren’t worth much more than to satisfy straight men, and straight men aren’t inter- ested in having sex with women on their period. No wonder it’s a saying that women don’t poop. Women just aren’t allowed to be gross. Of course this fundamental aspect of the patriarchy isn’t the prime example of ev- eryone’s reality. There are plenty of men who view women as full and complex human be- ings and those guys are awesome! However, the stigma against periods is engrained deep in society.
Being on my period means I can’t have sex. It means I don’t feel sexy, that I can’t wear white pants. I can’t play sports or go swimming. I don’t feel capable. I’m too hor- monal. I don’t feel like I’m good company. I feel people aren’t seeing me as reasonable. All of the sudden having your period goes from being a biological function to being something limiting, dirty, and shameful that we feel a need to hide. But sometimes you can’t hide it and you shouldn’t have to.
If menstruation weren’t seen as such an awful state to be in, maybe little girls wouldn’t be nervous about dealing with the curse when it was that time of the month, and female bodied people could express dis- comfort without feeling embarrassed. Be- cause at the end of the day, despite today’s efforts to be perfect in everyway, it’s impor- tant to keep in mind that we all have bodies just doing body things and there’s nothing wrong with that.
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